It’s May! It’s May!
Last month sure went by fast, and I can’t believe it’s been a full 2 weeks (or is it 3?) that I haven’t blogged at all!
A quick tangent: My last blog post mysteriously disappeared into thin air after I published it a week after my birthday and I’m still baffled why I can’t even find it anywhere in my Word Press dashboard. And yet it remains a link on my Facebook page. I’m so stumped. The only thing I can think of was that maybe I used the word damn a bit too much and the internet police intervened?
Maybe it was sent to purgatory where it can maybe get a decent makeover of sorts.
Except I don’t believe in that kind of purgatory.
But in a Land of Waiting ? an in-between space where one is neither a butterfly nor a caterpillar? a moment in Time when Now is Perfect and the Future even more Perfect still? That I believe.
There is SO much to share that I don’t even know where to start. I feel like I’m here, there and everywhere but it feels right and good. Life feels expansive and beautiful most days. I love every movement I’m taking towards my dreams and yet I also appreciate my slow and simple home life that grounds me more than ever. I’m growing to love life more, love me more, and heck love everything more.
So much Growing. Rising. Blooming.
It definitely feels like Spring all around me, but more so, within me. I feel like a new person, yet very much the same. The Possibilities excite me and yet my Present Reality feels perfect just the way it is.
:: Pause ::
Last Friday, I was supposed to teach my first Nia class ever. I put some feelers out to a bunch places where I could potentially teach a class for Fall but mid last week, I got a call from our neighborhood center asking me to teach a class for their women-only group. We live in a pretty diverse neighborhood and have a good portion of folks around here from East Africa. The women-only class is a space for them to get out of their garments and move together in a way that is comfortable and respectful of their religious beliefs. I was pretty stoked and said yes, even though there were definitely parts of me that was terrified at the idea. I jumped at the chance because I knew my body was ready while my mind could make a thousand and one excuses if I let it.
Friday after lunch, I got a call informing me that my class was canceled (I was even already wearing my Nia outfit at noon and the class was scheduled at 545 pm!). And I took it as a sign that maybe I was trying too hard to make it happen, my first Nia class. That maybe I could use a little bit more of waiting. And that all will unfold at just the right moment.
:: Pause ::
Transition is never the most comfortable place to be in. It’s a sorta awkward sorta amazing experience, to almost bloom but not quite. And yet all is well and everything is just as it should be. All I am now is enough and all I will become is just as enough.
So this blog is going to be a little mix of awkwardness and amazingness, hopefully, as I step into the Brilliance I am meant to offer the world, both here in my little wee home and way beyond. I might totally scrap this whole thing, which I’m sure I will grieve some because this blog has been my home here online, where I’ve shared deep parts of my heart and soul. But I’m ready for whatever is waiting, because I finally see that right Now, in the waiting, Brilliance, Bliss and Blessings are already in abundance.
They always are.