Climb dear one. As high as your limbs take you. Find your strength. Discover your edges. Explore your infinite potential and That which makes all things new. — VB
Hello. It’s been awhile.
I’ve missed you and I’ve missed here.
Spring has come and yet the weather fluctuates between flip-flop and fleece jacket temperatures. I don’t know if Seattle is just being typically bipolar or this is a taste of global warming getting worse.
Much like how I am sometimes.
I won’t even remind you how often I’ve said I’d quit blogging here only to return.
This past year, I definitely have been feeling less of a motivation to share through the written word. Which is something new for me. I have been focused on figuring out this homeschooling/unschooling thing while hacking WordPress for others and leading Nia classes. Had this been a few years back, I would have tried to steal hours away from sleep and do my darned best to still blog.
But no more of that.
Of course there have been occasions I’ve stayed way past my bedtime to finish a client’s website or figure out a new playlist for my Nia Class. But it’s more of an exception than my everyday rule.
And I’ve been learning so much about what my everyday rule needs to look like.
More importantly, that I do need rules — structure, order or whatever you call it, in order to thrive.
(And oh how much I fought that!)
Because the truth is, as much as I am about spontaneity and in the moment kind of living, I’m learning that you need the FORM just as much as you need FREEDOM.
(No, duh! I know, I’m pretty slow at these things.)
Just like our children need boundaries and rhythms so they can feel safe to play and expand their edges. Just like when we learn a Nia routine and we master the form so we can discover our creative potential in FreeDance. Just like how having a weekly plan for what you are gonna cook (aka the weekly menu) makes it possible for you to experiment and play in the kitchen when the mood strikes, without the stress (since you aren’t coming up with what to cook at a moment’s notice.)
When our family life follows a predictable pattern, it surprisingly has allowed for more playfulness and fun as a result.
Embracing the discipline of my everyday domesticity is helping me create the space for other things, new things in my life to open up and thrive.
On Unschooling and Freedom
Often, when folks think of unschooling, they think of freedom-loving families who have no bedtimes, no structures, no rules of any kind. And there are families who are like that in their un-schooling lifestyle and there is nothing wrong with that. I used to think that way too until we started to really figure out what unschooling looks like for us. I discovered that we don’t really thrive that way.
The kind of freedom I value is not so much about Autonomy, but about Authenticity. It’s about living by way of our Design as a human being, as a family, as a woman and as our individual selves. I’m discovering that our Design for Freedom is always always interwoven with our Design for Form. And that one really cannot co-exist without the other.
And that when one finds themselves more at home on one end of the spectrum, it’s probably a good idea to get a whole lot of practice dancing on the other end.
So if you want to be free, it’s probably a good idea to lean into discipline in ways that honor you and your family’s design. Explore what that looks like. Sense how that feels like.
I’m playing with the experience of discipline as pleasurable and fun. Simply because I want to be…FREE.
I leave you with wise words from the late Gabrielle Roth….
Do you (dare) have the discipline to be a free spirit?
I’d love to know. Do you tend to hang out more in the Freedom End or the Form End of the pool? How do you welcome both in your life? What do you need to invite more into your life right now? Let me know in the comments section.